Talk Plain

Man, these white collar trash give me auditory AIDS.

"That place is excellent. That place is a gold mine." Hear it here
"They're alright. I don't think they're great, they're alright."

Must be because I'm close to St. Louis that there's more of these college-degree consumer drones spreading their venereal disease through the airwaves.

When I say, 'Talk plain' this is what I mean... don't talk like these fake self-bragging airheads. If you like something, just say you like it. Don't turn it into amazing, or really great. Inflecting your voice to draw attention to yourself, making your life sound so interesting and making everything out to be so incredible, omg. It's phony, it's 'life is all about me me me', it's superficial, and it's fucking AIDS, man.

There's a table of about six behind me. Ages from early twenties to fourties. From the way they talked, how loud and piercing their voices were, and the vapid subjects they used to impress upon each other how interesting and awesome their lives were... I could tell they were white collar.

The guy spent 15 minutes drawing attention to his complaint that the restaurant didn't have a "lobster roll". He went on about what it was, and repeating his disbelief that they didn't have it. Dude... you're an ignorant yuppie. Most Chinese places DON'T have "lobster rolls". You probably bought one at McDonald's after driving past this place and got mixed up, ya dumb dumb. Besides, this is a buffet. You eat what they have. Fucking moron.

Yes, I know what lobster rolls are and I've seen them served at Chinese restaurants. But it's not here, alright? So get over it. It's not all about you. Stop repeating yourself and making the wait staff trying to figure this out, and making them out to look incompetent. Ya stupid piece of lo-mein-eating yuppie shit.

The blonde next to him was a yapdog. She was one of those women past their prime who didn't develop much after the teenage years except wrinkled skin and a bad tan. The only thing that didn't decline with use was her mouth. Yapping, and eating, and whatever else she does with it.

She kept repeating the same pitch about how great some card game was. Nobody cared and she got no response, so instead of shutting up about it... she kept talking in order to assert how amazing her awareness of this game made her. She briefly described what sounded like some version of Hearts where you roll dice. She didn't bother to talk about how it was played, just that it was sooooo awesome. Kids can play it, adults can play it, it's the perfect game. It's a drinking game, kids can play it with chips for fun. It's just so awesome.

All they have to discuss is various ways their lives are more interesting than other people's, whether they liked this or that food they were served, entertainment, and gossip about if he liked her or she liked him. They have no meaningful communication with each other. Talking is a constant competition to be making noise and attract attention.

Talk plain. Be natural. Say what you feel and what matters to you. And shut the fuck up. Do shut up, please.

Next time, I'm bringing my ear condoms with me whenever I'm around a city, university, or white collared trash and I'm blasting that contraceptive called Kyuss. Or next time I'll start flipping tables. There's your fucking Lobster Roll ya douchebag yuppie, and you can play your stupid dice game with the ice cubes on your nipples, ya noisy cunt!

L\|O|\L

It's not so much bothers me that rude, annoying people in the world exist, as much as it is that these privileged styrofoam jerks are allowed to think they're better than other people, because other people accept it in order to get money from them. And going through age 14 to 26 of my life surrounded in this environment, where it is accepted without question by the people around me that this is okay, and emulated by my peers, and being powerless to flip tables is what really boils my blood.

This is different from the single rude, annoying individual who everyone notices, turns their head to look, and is offended. That doesn't bother me. The problem is with him alone, and I can get around that. But when the community condones and propagates this culture of superficial attention-seeking ego, and it's not the rare dysfunctional individual who acts this way, but there are clones of these fleshbags of consumerism everywhere: on TV, in advertising, coffee shops, in every classroom, office, and mobile phone and I'm the one who stands out by feeling disgusted by it... then my bother with the situation is not the individual, but the countless institutions, corporations, who foster this mentality and culture, and the millions who abide by it and don't even turn heads when it happens.

It makes me sick to be around this culture, this system of people behaving and endorsing a life of consumerism, of self-absorbed ego, entertainment, 'having fun', and 'being the best', and 'leadership'. Those last three ideas are non-compatible terms. There are long lines of bodies thrown in ditches to make those three ideas happen for you, while other people suffer. It's not because you're the best. It's not because you're special, that you're chosen by God, or that you have nice things because you deserve them. Somebody has to do dirty work, somebody has to give up their life for your life to be so interesting, exciting, and fun: whether gladiators in the arena, or slaughtered in the streets.

"But those countries are violent and oppressive because of their insane religious beliefs, their backward culture, and their evil minds." Those are like wedge issues. Superficial differences thrown in the light of public interest to separate two candidates in an election. Do you support gay rights? Do you believe in abortion? You think our country is run based on whether two men can marry or if a lost young woman has a baby?  Ideologies do not put food on the plate. It's not that other nations are full of stupid savages, who if only they believed in women's rights and 'had fun' they would become the North Face, Ugg-wearing, recreational drug-using, concert-going, week-end traveling, craft beer tasting, interesting, exciting, leaders that make up our country.

The real issue is economic coercion, backed by military force. The real difference that separates our "freedom" country from "evil regimes" is wealth. The disparity between the natural resources consumed by our country, taken from little countries who produce all those resources and its local population gets to use very little of it themselves. All those entertaining, superficial distractions are paid for by raping their land of natural resources, enslaving their labor force with cheap wages, and maintaining 'peace' through an international military presence that keeps the spice flowing. The spice must flow!

So with all the luxury, disposable income, and leisure time you enjoy to make your life attract attention and envy of others, to feed the capitalist machine... wouldn't it be better for the human population if you were to do something, anything with a purpose besides feeding your own ego? The answer is always, yes somebody else does that... somebody else. 'There are people who...' and they will talk about those who volunteer and do charity work and all that bullshit that someone else is doing. Or someone will chirp up, I do this and that every week to help some noble cause to draw attention their leadership and win the spotlight for a brief moment while everyone pauses to reflect how his business card is more sublime in color of white, style of font and texture of paper a la American Psycho.

There's a ring of suffering for this wide population of sinners in Dante's hell. The fourth circle Greed."They use great weights as a weapon, pushing it with their chests which symbolizes their selfish drive for fortune during lifetime." 

"These people all had minds so warped and twisted in their first life. They spent without thought of moderation... Avarice is the main besetting sin. I ought to recognize in such a group as this a few of whom soiled themselves with evils of this kind. An empty hope. The life they led was undiscerning. It made them filthy. Now it makes them unrecognizable."

Or perhaps the eighth circle Fraud.