'Tis only a wallet wound

Wednesday, May 11th
Portland, OR

Bike theft

Downtown Portland

Whelp. I got my bike stolen overnight at Reed College library. Secured with a chain-style bike lock. It was out there too long.

LOL. One day I owned it. Was pretty nice while I had it. Paid it a salary of $15/hr.

Next time: Ubar lock. No overnight stays near colleges. And get outa Portland. Too many nice bikes around here attracts too many thieves.

I figure if someone wants to take my bike, they will. I seen broken Ubars lying around the campus, bikes without wheels, and a student I met reported his stolen bike taken from the indoor bike cage within the college that was behind security doors.

Fortune

Just, what are the chances of having that happen in one night? 100%. So I went out that same night and bought lottery tickets. I figure I'm already 1 for 1, so I'm guaranteed to win some money.

Persistence

I called the sports store, they'll have another exact model ready this weekend. So I'll be back where I was in a few days, minus a bank account. That won't stop me.

I'm too poor to care,
and too rich in spirit.

Salvation

I've already got this far. I've accomplished what I set out to. I feel no turn of bad events can take from me my salvation.

The bike stolen is not karma, or a sign from God, or anything of that sort. It is a test of my determination. Will I give up now, or do I push on?


Let's be real here

From a secular perspective, the bike stolen was an easy case of exposing my bike to excessive risk. Too long unattended. Late at night where there are no security on patrol. In a highly-targeted area for bike theft.

I coulda done many things to reduce the chances of my bike being stolen. A more secure locking mechanism. A less frequented location - not where lots of people pass at night and are unobserved.

I could have left the library during the night, instead of staying until morning. (One time, I caught a guy stealing my bike at 2 am.) I coulda taken the bike on my car to an out-of-the-way location and slept close by it.


Relief

Honestly, having the bike created many new liabilities. How to transport it, where to store it at night, needing to install accessories and load it for the trip. I was overwhelmed.

I had to tell myself, stop overthinking a solution. Stop trying to come up with the optimal plan. Just find *a* way to do it, and get it done. Well, that's what got my bike stolen in the first place - I went with an expedient plan - but I needed the relief. Hadn't eaten or slept enough for days.


Rest

Here's a picture of my hammock.

With me in it.

Cartoon

Here's what you're saying to a thief when you leave your bicycle outside:

At any time, day or night.

Unlocked: "Please take my bike. It's free."

Thought you might like this bicycle.
I picked it out just for you.

Thief: "K, thanks."

At night.
The code of the street is, whatever is left unattended outside at night belongs to anyone who passes by.

Chain-style lock: "Please don't take my bike."

I would really, really, really appreciate it
if you didn't take my bicycle, please.

Thief: "Nah, Imma take it. It looks nice."

U-bar lock: "Please don't take my lock."

A piranha'd bicycle corpse.

Thief: "Ok, no problem."

Double U-bar, with chained wheels: "I'm a huge asshole. I deserve my tires slashed and my wheels broken."

Nyah nyah na nyah na!
How you gonna get me now?

Thief: "WTF? You gave me your bike as soon as you left it out here at night. But you think it's funny putting me through all this trouble? Fuck you!"

I still don't want you to have nice things.