It's Hammock Time!

Final preparations before my bike trip!
Soon I will say, 'So long, mobile science home.'

Tuesday, May 10th.
Westmoreland Park
Portland, OR

Swing low, sweet chariot

I done some hammock testing Monday morning at Westmoreland park. A single person hammock (ENO sub7), $70, very lightweight and compact. Was so happy. I haven't lied down fully in months - sleeping in the car.

Actually, sleeping in the car in warm weather is kinda like being on a hammock, because I have my feet up in one corner of the backseat - but my head is lower than the rest of my body - in the space between the backseat and the driver seat. It's like being on a hammock that is tipping over backwards.

Had a lot of fun with my hammock. Was thrilled how fast, easy, and minimal space and weight it all needed. Anywhere two trees carelessly grew too close to another, in two minutes, I had a bedroom in the all outdoors.

I could sit and read. I could swing. I could stretch out on my back, on my belly - reach my arms out and sleep, or be lazy, or do nothing at all. All because I had a hammock. It's funny how it all becomes acceptable to do, once you're in a hammock. Otherwise, you can only do that in the privacy of a bedroom.

Wanted to get a cheaper hammock though, and that could enclose me. So during the day I found two alternatives. A cloth one from Home Depot $25, and a two-person one with (!) a mosquito net! (awesome!) $40.

New second-hand hat, and hot pink hair tie.
I'll take pictures of the hammock later.
Haven't had time.

Put your butt there

Hung my hammock and tested again at night. I thought of it as my first field test of the camping by way of hammock I will be doing on my bike trip. I didn't sleep much, but I learned a lot.

First I got smothered by the mosquito netting and perplexed with how to take advantage of the loops and collapsible mini-pole included with the hammock. Then I became a human thermometer when I realized the temperature dropped around 1:30 am.

Then surprise! Sprinklers in the park came on, and I was introduced to simulated rain. Maybe 3:30 am. At first, I yielded to this excuse to go back to my car - it would not be because I lacked grit that I went inside the rest of the night, it was me being practical to circumstances not to needlessly get all my stuff wet - that was my easy ploy.

But then I realized, a simulation is exactly what I wanted out of the night. To test how I would fare out on the road, having only what I packed to rely on, to make an assessment on the adequacy of my gear as well as my personal mettle.

So I stayed to witness the 1/360-th taste that sprinklers could provide of what it would be to camp in rain. I was merely on the outside edge of the sprinkler's programmed circular watering pattern. But two rounds of shots with the sprinkler and I was damp. Then I was partially wet. But that was enough to make my body entirely cold.

Remember I was still groping at two hours of sleep when this happened, so as much as I may have wanted to perform Johnny on-the-spot heroics in my dreams, it took a few persuasive encouragements from the sprinkler to rouse my corpse back to life.

Realizing I'm a lightweight compared to my drinking partner, I extracted the heat-reflective survival blanket I'd been lying on and hung it as a tarp over my hammock to make a make-to tent. The tent covered my body, but not my hammock and I continued to get wet - though at a much discounted rate.

The tent also slid down the rope to bunch up towards the middle, and one side outmatched the other in a game of tug-o-war that I had to mediate for fear of witnessing a winner that would put an end to the game I made of staying dry. I played fairly well.

The drinking game soon came to an end after my partner lost my companionship, so in that too, I was rewarded for my doggedness in staying. Before dawn, I examined the outlay of my shelter, and came to a few plans for renovation.

Knowing is half the battle

I would use a larger tarp that covers the length of the entire hammock, with four stakes in the ground to secure a peaceful state of tug-o-war. I'd need bungee cords for that.

The survival blanket would still serve me as a body-heat tent underneath the rain tent, and I would require ties underneath my hammock for the heat-tent to keep my warmth close.

• I'd hang up my shoes, so snakes don't sleep in them.

• A pad to step on when entering/exiting the hammock barefoot is really, really nice to have. 

An outdoor blanket when stored in its pouch is a great doormat for that purpose. It also can be a head pillow, a back support, or a seat cushion. Versatility: A+

• Mosquito netting doesn't work if the mosquitoes are lying on your face. 

So somehow, the collapsible poles and rope must be able to raise the netting above the hammock. It's all enclosed in one zip-up that you can slip into. So it is in a way a tent. A screen-door-for-a-roof tent that hangs off the ground.

• You can't sleep with your shoes inside the hammock.

• Wind exists.

• Night time is always cold. Summer only exists during the day.
  Prepare to jump from the frying pan into the freezer.

• You get hungry if you buy dinner but don't eat it.

• Large, immovable rocks are hard to see in the dark, but bicycles can easily detect them and then send notifications directly to your sphincter.

• Motion sickness doesn't end when the motion does. My ear fluids are still swaying on a boat.

• Staying dry is a luxury. Having a car to sleep inside means never having to deal with rain.

• Your back and butt will tell you when it gets cold. 

First, pad the bottom with something that blocks wind: a picnic blanket. Second, use the microfiber sherpa throw underneath you, because in 55F spring, it will still feel like the backseat of your car in 30F winter.

• Lying in a two-person hammock by yourself is like being on an unstable equilibrium line.
  The hammock will sway unsteadily creating motion sickness like a boat. 

The center where you would naturally sleep is a divider that tends to push you to one side or the other all the time. You would think after a while, the swaying would diminish because of friction and air resistance etc, but it seems to perpetuate forever.

Because on a two person hammock, you're balancing on a thin divider between a valley to your left and a valley to your right... when you're directly above the divider, force on you is zero, but any slight disturbance from that position and you'll feel maximal force pushing into the direction you are off-center.

So whenever you get close to stopping the motion of the hammock, by being exactly in the middle of the swing, you will slightly topple to one side or the other, and then you'll go shooting off in that direction.

In a single person hammock, as you would naturally think of, you're lying in the center of a valley so the force near the middle of the swing is low and restores you toward the valley, so the hammock loses velocity to friction and tends to rest at the middle.

• To reduce the unstable swaying of the two-person hammock, you gotta lie at an angle to the longitudinal symmetry line, so your head is on one side (left) and your feet are on the opposite (right). Even then, the balance still feels better to sleep on a single person hammock. 

And feels much better to sway on a single person hammock, because the motion tends to restore you to the center and you feel balanced all the time. The two-person hammock swaying feels like you will fall off one way, and then fall off the other way -

Not you know, that you are in danger of it happening, but the response of the motion is to make you go farther in the direction you sway, and it feels nauseating.

• When it rains, you will get wet. No matter how waterproof or well prepared you are. It's just a question of how wet you will be. 

An ally

There was a homeless guy camped behind a bathrooms building. He found a huge space that was like an alcove built for daytime mommies to duck rain. Guy had a tent, a bike. I didn't see his face at all; he was in the tent. Gave me a surprise that he was there as I biked by.

But I talked to him. Let him know I'd be hammocking in his backyard. He said the cops left him alone because he came late in the day, made no noise through the night, and left before anyone would come by. Scott, his name was, told me 'didn't have the balls' to travel from city to city, like I was planning to.

Hope you had the time of your life

In the morning Scott packed up around 4:30 am and I followed his lead. Mostly because I was damp and tired; I still wanted to try out my large tarp as a rain tent, but figured by the time I cycled to my car, packed the gear, and got back it would be daylight with possibly commuter bicyclists passing by and sleepless geriatrics on their long-awaited morning walks.

It would be less think-nothing-of-me setting up hammocks at dawn and I didn't want to feel conspicuous and self-conscious and objectionable about being seen. And I didn't have the energy to hurry the project.

Taking everything down and transporting it on my bike is already enough of a chore I need to deal with. I already went back during the night to get my winter blanket once. I abhor tedious repetition. If there is another way to do things the second time around, I overwhelmingly prefer it.

So I figure, I'll come back in the afternoon after a long doze in the car, set everything back up nice and proper, taking my time and feeling rightly proper respectable in doing so.

Planning the rest of my day

Today I got to make returns on the excess junk that I won't be using. To all the same places I shopped yesterday so it's all taken care of in the same place. Before I never come back again ever, then I'd have to look hard for each individual store.

I'll set up my hammock and take some pictures for the blog (Nope, you already know that didn't happen since you see no pictures. I was too busy with merchandise returns), and to the Mommy's shepherding their children who pass an accidental eye, I'll act all schools out for the summer. No asynchronicity for no one to object to.

To Do: Create 'To-do' list!

Oh, I had a ton of crystal clear dreams while sleeping from 5am to noon. At one point I imagined waking up looking at my bicycle mounted on the back of my car to make sure it was there, and when I opened my eyes, it lined up exactly with the image in my dream. Weird... I didn't move at all since I last looked at the bike. I must've checked at least five times.

There was another one with a song I made up with five lines for a chorus, in three word sentences - and I was saying each word deliberately, trying to keep them in my memory when I woke up. But I forgot what they were after curing my morning dehydration and crawling to the front seat to open my windows. Nor what the tune sounded like. But it was an awesome song. Trust me. It's a shame you weren't there to hear it.

Tons of great short dream scenes too. Cuz I was aware I was dreaming as it happened. So I was able to observe and get more out of the dream than I usually do. But then I forgot all of it. You might not believe me, but that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Just listen to my 1-hr long voice diary above, and you'll see I had soooo much on my mind to sort through that I couldn't remember what happened in my sleep. Ulix will back me up on this. (You don't shut up, Jonathan.) See?

Is this story going anywhere?

Nope. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention. LOL. The most important thing that started all this happiness and excitement! The night before. Monday evening. I bought my bike!

Waaaaaaaaah *Heaven gates sound effect*

Schwinn Adult Transit Cruiser Bike

I was so excited that everywhere I went, I wanted to leap to the sky like a Streetfighter hero. 

SHIN-RYU-KEN! 神龍拳.
Ken's "Divine Dragon Fist"

It's a different bike than I originally planned. Better features, bigger price tag. Schwinn Adult Transit Cruiser Bike ($350) from Dick's Sporting Goods. My first incentive to buy was to have a ready built bike on hand that I could just ride immediately. Yet I had to be sure it was the right bike.

I already bought a different bike (GMC Denali 22.5" 700c. $170 from Walmart) that I was awaiting delivery. But the uncertainty of shipping and self-assembling a bicycle was high enough to make me weigh my other options. I am certain now I will return the delivered bicycle once it arrives. Because this Schwinn has everything I need.

The strongest sell for me is that this bike has disc brakes. No more fussing with uncooperative eraser brakes on cheap bicycles. The traditional brakes never sit right for me once I've moved their original position.

I also like that a rear rack and fenders, which I was looking to add-on anyway to the GMC Denali, come already installed with the Schwinn. So some of that extra cost ($350 vs $170) will be absorbed by the value of the extra attachments I am paying for ($30 rack, $?? front and rear spoiler).

Not to mention the time, price of tools, additional research and hassle required to install them correctly myself. So in the end, I'm paying something like $100 extra for disc brakes and assembly. And probably a much better bicycle overall.

But I'm not just buying a bicycle. This vehicle is a physical representation of the culmination of my travels, and conception of the new journey ahead. I want it to be the right bicycle. This one comes with everything I'm looking for.

Seems she is the stallion I've been looking for to serve me on my journey. I think she'll do just fine.

She'll need a trail name. : - )